I'm Not Alright

"If you confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised Him from the dead, YOU will be saved." Romans 10:9 ESV (emphasis on YOU is mine!)

As a Christian, I lean on one unwavering fact, God created me to please and honor Him but because of my pride and selfishness, I am a fallen man. I fall short of my purpose and I have dishonored God at various points of my life. We all have sinned against God and we each fail at bringing Him the honor and glory He deserves from us all. 

Maybe you are thinking the same thought I used to think, "I am what I would call a good person." But I know in my heart that I have dishonored God by lying, cheating, lusting, stealing, rebelling against my parents and their authority, and I have expressed hatred towards other people. All of these sins have caused consequences in my life and the lives of others that were innocent, but they have also separated me from God. See, God is holy and as a result He has to resist and dismiss anything that is holy or else He would cease to be God. And because He is perfect, He can't allow my sin to go unpunished or He wouldn't be the ultimate judge of all, again He would cease to be God. The Bible tells me that my sins separate me from God and that "death" is the payment for the sin I commit. The death that the Bible speaks of isn't merely a physical death but also spiritual death that brings on complete and total separation from God forever. 

I can lean on my so called "good deeds" and live with the hope that they make me a good person or I can realize that no amount of good deeds, and no amount of earthly work will ever be enough to get me to heaven. They will not present me as holy in the eyes of God. If this was true then millions of people could buy their way into heaven like they do into Sams club or the local country club. That is not only ludicrous but it also denies God the glory and honor that He deserves.  

Now, enough with all the negative stuff. The good news is that God is not only just in action, He is also loving, forgiving, and most of all, merciful. He provided a way for each and every person a better way to have forgiveness and to come to know Him in the most personal of ways. Out of His own love for me and you, He sent His Son, Jesus Christ, as a substitution for our sin. He went through all the pain and anguish that was meant for me and for you. He shed His Holy blood in the most vile and painful of ways so that we could once again gain access to the throne and one day again see the glory that is God. Jesus' death satisfied the punishment for every sin known to man while also providing a perfect combo of mercy and God's love for you and me. 

Romans 5:8 says, "But God shows His love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us." And because of the death and resurrection of Jesus we have been given the chance at forgiveness and ultimately finding peace with God. It is a free gift. Yes, I didn't stutter when I said that. It is completely free. God wanted to show us, His creation, exactly how much He loved each one of us by freely offering up salvation to everyone. Paul tells me this again in Ephesians 2:1-10, “And you were dead in the trespasses and sins in which you once walked, following the course of this world, following the prince of the power of the air, the spirit that is now at work in the sons of disobedience— among whom we all once lived in the passions of our flesh, carrying out the desires of the body and the mind, and were by nature children of wrath, like the rest of mankind. But God, being rich in mercy, because of the great love with which he loved us, even when we were dead in our trespasses, made us alive together with Christ—by grace you have been saved— and raised us up with him and seated us with him in the heavenly places in Christ Jesus, so that in the coming ages he might show the immeasurable riches of his grace in kindness toward us in Christ Jesus. For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God, not a result of works, so that no one may boast. For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them.” 

Before I was saved I was completely dead in my sin. While physically alive, I was dead to God because I couldn't be in His presence in that state. I had to be redeemed in order to gain the access of Him. He sent the Holy Spirit to convict me in my current state and show me that there was another way to really live. All I had to do was turn away from my sinful ways and humbly trust Jesus for my salvation. By surrendering my will to Him, I had found the freedom that I knew I truly needed. There is a song by Sanctus Real that accurately describes what I am trying to express:

"If weakness is a wound that no one wants to speak of
Then "cool" is just how far we have to fall
I am not immune, I only want to be loved
But I feel safe behind the firewall

Can I lose my need to impress?
If you want the truth I need to confess

I'm not alright, I'm broken inside
Broken inside
And all I go through, it leads me to you
It leads me to you

Burn away the pride
Bring me to my weakness
'Til everything I hide behind is gone
And when I'm open wide with nothing left to cling to
Only you are there to lead me on

'Cause honestly, I'm not that strong"

There have been literally millions of people all over the world that have found the peace that they were searching for when the found a relationship with Jesus Christ. But I can't do it for you. You can't get into heaven on your mama's coattails. You can't donate large amounts of money and buy your way into heaven. So what is stopping you from giving your life over to God? Ask yourself this question: Do I understand that I need forgiveness? Am I ready to accept God's grace and mercy? It is only a simple prayer way. The turn you're looking for is just around the corner. Be honest with God about who you are and the mistakes you have made in your life. Place your feet on the firmest foundation you'll ever find and plant a marker in your life that you can look back on to show others the commitment you made to the Lord. It all starts with opening your heart to Him and allowing Him to lead you for the rest of your life. 

"But in your hearts honor Christ the Lord as holy, always being prepared to make a defense to anyone who asks you for a reason for the hope that is in you." 1st Peter 3:15 ESV

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