“Do not reprove a scoffer, or he will hate you; reprove a wise man, and he will love you. Give instruction to a wise man, and he will be still wiser; teach a righteous man, and he will increase in learning. The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom, and the knowledge of the Holy One is insight.” Proverbs 9:8-10 ESV
I watched last night Presidential debate and wasn't sure exactly what I was watching, a debate of two political opponents or a WWE Steel Cage Match for the United States Championship.
All kidding aside, if you pick up a newspaper, scroll down through your favorite news media website, or slip on the local news channel I am sure that you will find quite a few conflicts to hear about. Often times these things come from one side or the other and more often than not it inflames tempers and becomes heated. It is human nature to let disagreements get personal, and too often people resort to name calling, mockery, and personal attacks. We often assume that when someone doesn't agree with us that they are disapproving of who we are. Or could it be that we just get so frustrated at their opinions and lash out in anger at them? Or maybe you realize that really are wrong and are too insecure to admit it? Whatever our reasons, the disagreements we find ourselves in can turn into a personal conflict quite quickly.
I can't sit here and honestly tell you that I know many people who actually enjoy arguing, other than those that prefer to bully those around them. But in a normal setting, I don't think that conflict is something we should fear. It really is an opportunity to understand the differences between us all. I have one perspective and you have another. And if we can understand the others view point then it all can be valuable to us. The sharing of different ideas, while not allowing to be taken personally, can benefit everyone involved.
Think about this with me for a moment....
You find yourself in a conflict with someone else. Try approaching it as a positive opportunity, even if the other person doesn't see it the way that you do. Agree with them to talk about your differences of opinion and stress to them that you want to talk about the problem itself and not each other. Let the other person know that having a different view can be a healthy and normal thing. The key is making it clear that you value their opinion, no matter how different, and that you want to come to some sort of resolution. The key to all of this is keeping the level of respect at a high importance level. Focus on the principle issue and not the people involved.
I wish that I could say I have mastered this (I haven't) but I am working on it. I have found that when I approach a difficult situation in the way I described that often times I learn more than if I explode in anger and damage an already fragile situation. When I approach a conflict as an opportunity to learn, I find the fuel to make a positive change in the situation and even as far as in my own life.
I watched last night Presidential debate and wasn't sure exactly what I was watching, a debate of two political opponents or a WWE Steel Cage Match for the United States Championship.
All kidding aside, if you pick up a newspaper, scroll down through your favorite news media website, or slip on the local news channel I am sure that you will find quite a few conflicts to hear about. Often times these things come from one side or the other and more often than not it inflames tempers and becomes heated. It is human nature to let disagreements get personal, and too often people resort to name calling, mockery, and personal attacks. We often assume that when someone doesn't agree with us that they are disapproving of who we are. Or could it be that we just get so frustrated at their opinions and lash out in anger at them? Or maybe you realize that really are wrong and are too insecure to admit it? Whatever our reasons, the disagreements we find ourselves in can turn into a personal conflict quite quickly.
I can't sit here and honestly tell you that I know many people who actually enjoy arguing, other than those that prefer to bully those around them. But in a normal setting, I don't think that conflict is something we should fear. It really is an opportunity to understand the differences between us all. I have one perspective and you have another. And if we can understand the others view point then it all can be valuable to us. The sharing of different ideas, while not allowing to be taken personally, can benefit everyone involved.
Think about this with me for a moment....
You find yourself in a conflict with someone else. Try approaching it as a positive opportunity, even if the other person doesn't see it the way that you do. Agree with them to talk about your differences of opinion and stress to them that you want to talk about the problem itself and not each other. Let the other person know that having a different view can be a healthy and normal thing. The key is making it clear that you value their opinion, no matter how different, and that you want to come to some sort of resolution. The key to all of this is keeping the level of respect at a high importance level. Focus on the principle issue and not the people involved.
I wish that I could say I have mastered this (I haven't) but I am working on it. I have found that when I approach a difficult situation in the way I described that often times I learn more than if I explode in anger and damage an already fragile situation. When I approach a conflict as an opportunity to learn, I find the fuel to make a positive change in the situation and even as far as in my own life.
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