If you turn on the news or pick up a newspaper I am almost certain that you will find some sort of conflict to read about or watch. If you turn on the radio, depending on the station, you will assuredly find some pretty heated conversation. I mean just look on Facebook or Twitter, you will certainly find people crucifying each other over difference of opinion. It is human nature to let disagreements get personal, and too often people resort to name calling, mockery, and personal attacks to try and get one up on their opponent. We often assume that when some disagrees with us that they are attacking us or disapproving of who we are. And from time to time we get frustrated at the opinions of others and lash out in anger; most of the time this happens because we are wrong and are too insecure to admit it. Whatever the reason our disagreements can turn personal very easily.
I don't many people who actually like conflict, other than those that take pleasure in bullying others. But in normal circumstances, I don't think we need to fear it. Conflict is really just an opportunity to understand the things that make us different. We have one perspective, someone else has another, and if both are understood, they can both be valuable. Sharing different ideas and perspectives without letting things get personal can benefit everyone involved.
I have been trying a new way to resolve conflict and I want to share it with you. When you find yourself in a conflict with someone, approach it as a positive opportunity, even if the other person doesn't see it your way. When you agree to talk about it, and you emphasize that you want to focus not on each other but on the problem it helps stop anger and bitterness before it starts. You have to acknowledge that having a different opinion can be healthy. Make it clear that you value the other's perspective and that you want a constructive resolution. Then explore how you can get past the problem in a way that respects everyone involved.
When conflict is approached like this you will find that it will give a chance to all involved to grow or to see the issue more fully and from a different perspective.
"Do not reprove a scoffer, or he will hate you; reprove a wise man, and he will love you. Give instruction to a wise man, and he will be still wiser; teach a righteous man, and he will increase in learning." Proverbs 9:8-9 ESV
I don't many people who actually like conflict, other than those that take pleasure in bullying others. But in normal circumstances, I don't think we need to fear it. Conflict is really just an opportunity to understand the things that make us different. We have one perspective, someone else has another, and if both are understood, they can both be valuable. Sharing different ideas and perspectives without letting things get personal can benefit everyone involved.
I have been trying a new way to resolve conflict and I want to share it with you. When you find yourself in a conflict with someone, approach it as a positive opportunity, even if the other person doesn't see it your way. When you agree to talk about it, and you emphasize that you want to focus not on each other but on the problem it helps stop anger and bitterness before it starts. You have to acknowledge that having a different opinion can be healthy. Make it clear that you value the other's perspective and that you want a constructive resolution. Then explore how you can get past the problem in a way that respects everyone involved.
When conflict is approached like this you will find that it will give a chance to all involved to grow or to see the issue more fully and from a different perspective.
"Do not reprove a scoffer, or he will hate you; reprove a wise man, and he will love you. Give instruction to a wise man, and he will be still wiser; teach a righteous man, and he will increase in learning." Proverbs 9:8-9 ESV
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