Our Loss Is His Gain

'Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our affliction, so that we may be able to comfort those who are in any affliction, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God. For as we share abundantly in Christ's sufferings, so through Christ we share abundantly in comfort too. If we are afflicted, it is for your comfort and salvation; and if we are comforted, it is for your comfort, which you experience when you patiently endure the same sufferings that we suffer. Our hope for you is unshaken, for we know that as you share in our sufferings, you will also share in our comfort. '

2nd Corinthians 1:3-7

Someone asked me this tonight: "What does grief actually feel like?" And this is the best explanation I could come up with and I want to share it with you in the event that someone out there is going through what I have experienced in my life.

Right now, somewhere in this world, there is a family that is starting to experience the pure misery that is knowing that a husband isn't coming home anymore. Daddy won't be there to throw the football, start the go-cart, mow the lawn on Saturday morning, or take his sons fishing. A woman will go to bed alone and will reach out in the darkness and find an empty space where her husband once slept. Children that will get up in the morning and will forget that dad isn't there and go look for him only to be reminded that he isn't there anymore.

Right now, there is a husband that is all alone for the first time in years. He is trying to put on a brave face for the family and friends that are filling his home during this unfortunate time but its when they all go home and the house gets so quiet that the loneliness and despair start to set in. He lies there night after night, unable to sleep and finally at 4 a.m., he gets up and walks in the bathroom to her side of the bathroom they shared, turns hairdryer dryer and places it into the sink and turns on the shower, simply to have the experience of the noise of his wife getting ready early in the morning to give him a sense of normalcy, praying to catch a little sleep before he has to start another day alone.

Death is our enemy. It doesn't pick and choose. It comes for the ones that it comes for and leaves behind it a human wreckage of hurt, loss, grief, and at times, anger for all those left behind.

But it doesn't have to be that way...

I once heard a wise man say, "Death is never punishment for His children." (JT) When we are believers in a risen Christ and we have been saved by His death and resurrection, we have nothing to fear from death. As Christians, we already have the victory, even in the face of death. That doesn't mean that it doesn't hurt those that we leave behind when we go. Trust me when I say the hurt is still there. The loss is still raw. But when we know that our loved one was a believer and had been covered by the saving grace of Christ, we should celebrate the loss for it was His gain.

The moment that they step across the threshold of eternity, they are received by all the angels in heaven, those that went on before them, and most important, they get an audience with the one that sacrificed His life for theirs. God had a plan that was laid down long before we came to this world and He knows how that plan will unfold. There has been a great multitude of people that came before us and there will be more that will come after us. What matters is what we do with the time that we have while we are here.

While I can't guarantee the times won't be hard after the loss, what I can say is that when the time comes, if they know Christ, the time is easier and all the sweeter because we know how the story ends and we know that they are with their Lord and Savior. I can tell you in my own life, that when I lost my spouse a few years back, that it was the fact that knew where she was and whom she was with that carried me through that valley.

God tells us many times in His word that He will never leave nor forsake us, especially in times like that. He is the friend that sticks closer than a brother. All we need to do is humble ourselves and receive the free grace that He has to offer. He promises us that He will comfort the lost and afflicted.