Today has been one of those days where I ask myself, "Why Me? Why Today? What Have I Done To Deserve This?" There is nothing quite as stinging as getting blindsided by criticism. It can make you find a deep dark cave and want to crawl off into it. It is like having your knees chopped off while you are running full steam. One minute you are up and the next you are crawling around on the floor.
I don't care how big you are or how tough you might be, criticism hurts. It doesn't care who you are, how many people you try to help, or how happy you might feel all it takes is one critical word or email or phone call to spread like poison throughout your day.
If only there was a pill or a potion that you could take that would make all the criticism go away. I don't have anything like that but what I can offer is pretty smart in my estimation.
The thing that everyone has to figure out when they are being criticized is this person trying to help me or hinder me? No amount of criticism is fun, but it can be helpful if it is from a wise and discerning person. A wise person speaks words that are truly intended to help us in the long run. Proverbs 15:2 says, "The tongue of the wise commends knowledge, but the mouths of fools pour out folly." In reading this a wise person is one who cares enough about me to speak honestly and doesn't assume anything. They speak with God regularly and reflect a gentle but firm tone in their communication. Ultimately, they use their criticism in a graceful manner sharing it with helpful wisdom that constructs rather than destructs. We all know someone that is destructive with their words. And if their criticism is hurtful and destructive, then we must remember the second part of aforementioned proverb. In Proverbs 15:2 the word "folly" literally means a "lack of understanding or common sense." I find myself often using too harsh a words or unnecessary criticism when dealing with others underneath me at work. I have to remember that this says more about my insecurities and my inadequacies than it does about them.
You can never put a word that was spoken back into your mouth. You can't fix the hurt that you caused when you lashed out, but you can decide to remain calm and not compound the hurt. Proverbs 15:1 says, "A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger." It takes more courage to not speak than it does to speak sometimes. Make sure you choose your words carefully and wisely. Do not cause another harm due to rash speaking.
Like I said previously, no matter whether it is meant as helpful or hurtful, criticism still hurts. And trust me when I say this, you will NOT always feel like being calm about it at first. You have to choose to make the right decision when faced with harsh or hurtful things. You have to learn to stay calm. That ability is as much a gift of God as wisdom or grace. Thankfully we don't serve a God of criticism or condemnation. We serve a God of grace and mercy. If we allow him to, he will teach us to control and tame our tongue. We simply have to place all our trust in him. Especially, when we are hurt by the actions and words of others.
If you remember only one thing remember this: Take what is helpful and leave what is hurtful.
I don't care how big you are or how tough you might be, criticism hurts. It doesn't care who you are, how many people you try to help, or how happy you might feel all it takes is one critical word or email or phone call to spread like poison throughout your day.
If only there was a pill or a potion that you could take that would make all the criticism go away. I don't have anything like that but what I can offer is pretty smart in my estimation.
The thing that everyone has to figure out when they are being criticized is this person trying to help me or hinder me? No amount of criticism is fun, but it can be helpful if it is from a wise and discerning person. A wise person speaks words that are truly intended to help us in the long run. Proverbs 15:2 says, "The tongue of the wise commends knowledge, but the mouths of fools pour out folly." In reading this a wise person is one who cares enough about me to speak honestly and doesn't assume anything. They speak with God regularly and reflect a gentle but firm tone in their communication. Ultimately, they use their criticism in a graceful manner sharing it with helpful wisdom that constructs rather than destructs. We all know someone that is destructive with their words. And if their criticism is hurtful and destructive, then we must remember the second part of aforementioned proverb. In Proverbs 15:2 the word "folly" literally means a "lack of understanding or common sense." I find myself often using too harsh a words or unnecessary criticism when dealing with others underneath me at work. I have to remember that this says more about my insecurities and my inadequacies than it does about them.
You can never put a word that was spoken back into your mouth. You can't fix the hurt that you caused when you lashed out, but you can decide to remain calm and not compound the hurt. Proverbs 15:1 says, "A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger." It takes more courage to not speak than it does to speak sometimes. Make sure you choose your words carefully and wisely. Do not cause another harm due to rash speaking.
Like I said previously, no matter whether it is meant as helpful or hurtful, criticism still hurts. And trust me when I say this, you will NOT always feel like being calm about it at first. You have to choose to make the right decision when faced with harsh or hurtful things. You have to learn to stay calm. That ability is as much a gift of God as wisdom or grace. Thankfully we don't serve a God of criticism or condemnation. We serve a God of grace and mercy. If we allow him to, he will teach us to control and tame our tongue. We simply have to place all our trust in him. Especially, when we are hurt by the actions and words of others.
If you remember only one thing remember this: Take what is helpful and leave what is hurtful.
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