"Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you." Colossians 3:13 NIV
I was asked by someone the other day this simple but complex question: How do you know if you've truly forgiven someone? I had to stop and think about that one for a second. Well actually it took me more than a second, it took me about 4 days. This is what I came up with:
Knowing when you have truly forgiven someone comes easier when you understand the realities of forgiveness.
Forgiveness requires us to surrender our right to get even. The blood of Jesus covers all of our sins, but each of us must do personal business with God to experience his forgiveness. When we forgive, we place the outcome of the matter in God's hands and choose to live with unbalanced scales.
Something that I had to learn the hard way was that real forgiveness takes time. God can forgive in a single breath, but we need time. We may have to forgive over and over before it becomes real to us. But let me say this, forgiving doesn't require that you forget it. God said in Isaiah 43:25, "I, even I, am he who blots out your transgressions, for my own sake, and remembers your sins no more."(NIV) But did God forget that Peter denied his Lord? On a human level, it is futile to try to forget; the more we try, the more we remember. But we can detoxify the memory; we can purge its vile poison from our soul.
As Christians, forgiving is expected. Nothing enables us to forgive like knowing in our hearts that we have been completely forgiven. That is why Jesus taught us to pray, "Forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors"(Matthew 6:12 NIV) It is unthinkable for a forgiven person to refuse to forgive someone else.
Forgiveness is like putting on your socks in the morning. It may take a minute but it is simply something that you just have to do.
I was asked by someone the other day this simple but complex question: How do you know if you've truly forgiven someone? I had to stop and think about that one for a second. Well actually it took me more than a second, it took me about 4 days. This is what I came up with:
Knowing when you have truly forgiven someone comes easier when you understand the realities of forgiveness.
Forgiveness requires us to surrender our right to get even. The blood of Jesus covers all of our sins, but each of us must do personal business with God to experience his forgiveness. When we forgive, we place the outcome of the matter in God's hands and choose to live with unbalanced scales.
Something that I had to learn the hard way was that real forgiveness takes time. God can forgive in a single breath, but we need time. We may have to forgive over and over before it becomes real to us. But let me say this, forgiving doesn't require that you forget it. God said in Isaiah 43:25, "I, even I, am he who blots out your transgressions, for my own sake, and remembers your sins no more."(NIV) But did God forget that Peter denied his Lord? On a human level, it is futile to try to forget; the more we try, the more we remember. But we can detoxify the memory; we can purge its vile poison from our soul.
As Christians, forgiving is expected. Nothing enables us to forgive like knowing in our hearts that we have been completely forgiven. That is why Jesus taught us to pray, "Forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors"(Matthew 6:12 NIV) It is unthinkable for a forgiven person to refuse to forgive someone else.
Forgiveness is like putting on your socks in the morning. It may take a minute but it is simply something that you just have to do.
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